Meiling's Ramblings
by ToriS
Summary: My first CCS fic, so please don't kill me. It's in Meiling's POV but is really about Sakura and Syaoran. R & R if you really want to ^^


Disclaimer: I do NOT own CCS...Wish I did though...  
  
AN: Sorry if this sucks. This is my first attempt at CCS and I'm not entirely familiar with the series. I know the characters and I know how it ends, but I've only seen the English episodes. o_O I know that sucks doesn't it? So, I apologize up front for any mistakes or if it doesn't make much sense. Anyway, this is told in Meiling's (Oh, the horror of it all) point of view and it is somewhat of an S+S. I'm planning on writing a much longer story with those two in it but for now you'll have to deal with this one. ^^' Anyway, enough babbling...  
  
Meiling Ramblings  
  
Oh my gosh, I cannot believe how boring this day is. It's Saturday, my day off from school, and I'm not doing anything. Well, okay. So, I'm walking around this Japanese Mall. I suppose that counts for SOMETHING. But, it just isn't the same without my Li-kun around. *sigh* *drool* Ah, I wish he were here with me right now. We are engaged, so we should spend some quality time together, ne? I love him, I really do. And he's so cute! With that glare of his, ahh...so adorable.  
  
[Stops suddenly in her walking]  
  
And don't you guys go saying "Eww!" "That's so gross!" So, he's my cousin, big deal. I know that everybody in this world has felt some kind of attraction toward their cute relatives before, so don't even think about criticizing me for it. Besides, you don't even know the whole story on us, anyway, and until you do you have no right.  
  
[She sighs contentedly when she no longer hears protests and then resumes her walking and window shopping]  
  
That's better.  
  
Anyway, as I was saying...Wait, what was I saying??? Hmm...Something about my Li-kun...Oh, yeah! I wasn't lying when I said I loved him. But, of course, it isn't the way most engaged couples are. I'm not into incest. Incest is NOT best, you know? He's family...and probably the best friend I've got. He's not the only one thinking of this engagement as forced. I just look at it on the bright side: at least I'm marrying someone I know and trust and who will love me eternally, if not in the romantic way. How many womn can say that about their husbands?  
  
Ugh, where is he? I've left the mall, stopped by his house, and now I'm headed to the park. Damn! Can't he spare at least one day out of the YEAR for me? Grr...he's probably out card capturing with Sakura again. With HER. Always with her.  
  
Before you say it, NO I'm NOT jealous.  
  
He loves her, you know. Sakura. Even if he doesn't realize it, I know he does.  
  
I'm really not so stupid and blind that I don't see this. Don't let the hairstyle fool you. I may look similar to that Tsukino-Usagi-Odango-brained-Sailor Senshi-Sailor Moon, but believe me, there's no comparison.  
  
Besides, Syaoran is so transparent. He tries to act all tough-guy, but the second their eyes meet, he melts into this sappy...THING and he stutters and blushes and well, it makes me want to hurl. Come on peoples! We're 10. Count that, TEN years old. *sigh*  
  
Anyway, where was I?  
  
Oh, yea. Li-kun transparency. He reminds me of a cross between (forgive me for this GW fans, I couldn't think of anything esle. Gomen!) Heero Yuy, Trowa Barton, and occasionally Duo Maxwell from that totally kawaii Japanese cartoon Gundam Wing. Like Heero Yuy, he glares daggers at everyone, but like Trowa Barton, he fails in his attempt to remain emotionless. Quiet, yes. Emotionless, no. Sometimes, he'll be silent for days, and then suddenly a light bulb will turn on in that thick skull of his and he'll yap my ears off for hours and hours kinda like Duo Maxwell.  
  
During his rambling hours, I see his love for the card mistress shine through. Everything turns to Sakura. From her bright smile to her pretty green eyes. I'm telling you, it's sick the amount of sap that comes from that warrior. Sometimes I have to fight the urge to scream at him to stop with the sap already and just tell her how he feels and--- hey, is that voices I hear? It sounds like Li-kun and a girl...  
  
[Stops and looks ahead of her in the clearing of the bushes]  
  
Sakura.  
  
I should have known he would be with her. He doesn't have his Lasen board out. She doesn't have one of those ridiculously ruffly costumes Tomoyo makes on, which means they're meeting on their own for no reason in this beautiful secluded area of the park...  
  
Hmm....such a romantic meeting place....  
  
SYAORAN!!!!!  
  
I half-expect him to turn around at my mental shout of his name; he's done it before. I wonder what they're up to. Hey, there's Tomoyo recording as usual. Maybe she knows what's up.  
  
[Walks up and crouches next to Tomoyo]  
  
"Mei-Meiling! What are you doing here?"  
  
"I came to spy on them. What is my Li-kun up to?" Tomoyo rolls her eyes at my question and I fight the urge to slap her...  
  
"He isn't YOUR Li-kun, Meiling. He's-"  
  
I stop her before she can finish. "I know he isn't mine. But, he IS my cousin and I want to know what it is that he's doing with HER."  
  
"I don't know what they're doing. I just showed up and saw my Sakura-chan with Li-kun, and I was just so happy that I had my video camer with me, and-"  
  
"Enough, little girl. I just wanted to know if you knew why they were here, not your whole life story."  
  
"Why you!" She lunges at me and we almost topple over into the clearing with Sakura and Syaoran. While trying to fight off the pale girls' hands around my neck, I hear them pick up their conversation again. Did I just hear 'love'? No...I throw her off of me and put my hand over her mouth. "mmmfffmmmddpphh"  
  
"Shh! They're talking again!" She promptly stops struggling and pays attention to the people standing in the clearing.  
  
"Syaoran-kun, what's wrong? You seem nervous..."  
  
"Why would I be nervous?" Sakura sweatdrops.  
  
"Syaoran, you've just about ripped a hole in the sleeve of your shirt. You're as pale as a ghost, I might add.(Oh my, Sakura being observant? NO WAY) Are you sick?" (nope. Still clueless)  
  
"No, Sakura-san."  
  
"Sakura-SAN?" He averts her gaze at her question and shifts from one foot to the other. "Syaoran, why are you being so weird with me lately?"  
  
"I'm not."  
  
"Yes, you are." She replies raising her voice a little. "You've been all formal with me for the last week. We've known each other for a while now. Formality is not something we have ever really used, so why start now?"  
  
"Sakura, if you only brought me here to lecture me on the way I say your name, then forget it. I say your name the way I want to say it." He starts to walk away and she grabs his arm to keep him from doing so. "Leave me alone." I could tell he was trying to sound threatening, but he was failing miserably.  
  
"Li-kun! Why are you being this way?" Tomoyo and I sigh. He's stubborn. She's persistent. This could go on for hours.  
  
"Look, maybe I respect you, okay? Maybe I'm finally showing respect towardthe Card mistress. Is that okay with you?"  
  
"NO. I don't like it when people treat me like that! And anyway, that is NOT an excuse. You've never shown it before, why would you start now?" Silence. "Syaoran, WHY?"  
  
"Because, I love you, okay? I LOVE YOU. Are you happy now?"  
  
Everybody stops in their tracks. The world stops its rotation, everything is silent.  
  
"You-you what?"  
  
He looks down, red as a lobster. I would have laughed, but I was frozen in my spot. I can't believe he just confessed his feelings to her. Where does that leave me? He's engaged to ME. Tomoyo must have noticed I was angry casue she put her hand on my shoulder. I could only stand there, numb to the world. I did hear the rest of their conversation.  
  
"Nothing. Forget it."  
  
"No, no. You just said that you-you-"  
  
Syaoran turned in our direction suddenly. I must have sniffled louder than I thought. He had this strange look in his eyes when he locked them with mine. Sakura turns to where he's looking and gasps.  
  
"Meiling..." Syaoran mumbles my name and looks down in shame. I walk slowly up to him and I know I'm crying.  
  
It's funny how even though you know the one you love loves someone else, it only begins to hurt your heart when you hear them say it. Me, I'm not one to really show how much I'm hurting; I have to much pride for that. So, even though I'm visibly crying, I let my anger mask the pain. "That's right Syaoran Li. You should be ashamed. You are engaged to me and now you're confessing your love to your sworn rival!" At each word I said I got louder and closer to him until I was shouting into his face. He just look ashamed. He also looked like he was about to run to all the way back to Hong Kong.   
  
"So what if he is? You are FAMILY, Meiling! Not lovers! I love him too and you are NOT going to stand in our way!" Syaoran turns to her in surprise. I back down slowly and look at the emerald-eyed girl. She was blushing and shaking.   
  
You know, there was some part of me that always hoped that the Card Mistress didn't have the same feelings in return. I guess that's one of the reasons I always hung on Li. I knew he wouldn't say anything to her about the way he felt with me around and I wanted to keep it that way...I was afraid that if he ever said anything he would get hurt. At her words, though, my anger dissapated.   
  
I lost.   
  
He loves her and she loves him.  
  
At this point he started stuttering about her loving him too. Could it be true? Oy, I was already getting annoyed. Tomoyo was sweatdropping at the blushing and stuttering couple. I sucked it up; all the sadness, all the hurt. I would save it for home. Right now I had to save my cousin from the embarrassment he was sure to cause himself.   
  
"OH WOULD YOU JUST KISS ALREADY!!!"   
  
Everybody turns to me. Syaoran and Sakura look surprised as all Hell. Tomoyo almost drops her camera. Forest animals stop in their activities. I just stand next to Tomoyo with a sad smile on my face.   
  
All at once, everything starts up again and Sakura is 'Hoeee' ing cause she's supposed to be at home and Syaoran is still stuttering something about walking her home. She casually reminds him of Touya and he becomes still as a statue, panic overwhelming him. Tomoyo sighs a happy 'Kawaii!' as Sakura kisses him on the cheek, taking my advice after all. Sakura leaves and Syaoran just starts walking aimlessly, obviously in la-la land.   
  
Who'd have thought that one little peck on the cheek could turn him into that?   
  
*sigh*  
  
Now that he's gone, some of the pain in my features returns and I feel Tomoyo's hand around my shoulders once again. I turn to her. I was surprised she was being nice to me. I always thought she hated me. She smiles and starts walking with me toward our homes.   
  
Some days it just isn't worth getting up. If I had known I would wake up today to say goodbye to my cousin, I never would have woken up. I wasn't ready to let go of the happy little dream of having my best friend as my husband.   
END  
  
Okay, I know that sucked. And I kept changing Meiling's views on her engagement to Syaoran. -_-' I'm really sorry if it didn't make much sense. Feel free to flame me for screwing up all the character's personalities. But, please forgive me! Oh and please Review. I'd love to know what you think, good or bad. Thanks! ^^ 


End file.
